shizukuxp

this is my everyday routine:

wake up around 10am, turn off the aircon cause it's been drying my skin and hurting my throat, go to the restroom, brush my teeth, comb my hair and then go back to sleep.

then wake up around 2pm, eat lunch, switch on the computer, check my mails, friendster, and FIBA site, tune into RSS feeds and read news about Team Iran, while doing so answer surveys in Friendster, or watch JDorama in Utube.com, and then around 7pm, check whether my boyfriend is online so i can chat with him. if not, then i'll just write a blog entry or just turn off the computer.

then i hit the showers, eat dinner, then head off to the nearby mall to buy goodies. after which i'll turn on the TV, watch anything on hbo, Animax, or local channels, before studying some Japanese. if i'm in the mood, i'll open my books on Coding Theory or Algebraic Number Theory or write some C++ codes.

then, i'll watch some downloaded series on my laptop before turning to bed.

woaah, life of a bum!

Currently watching: Cupid no Itazura
Currently feeling: okay

shizukuxp

FIBA

champions finally!  I will surely miss watching basketball when I go to another country where football is the main sport. oh well, at least I really got to see a lot of games while I'm here in the P.I.

Currently watching: Cupid no Itazura Final Episode
Currently feeling: thankful

shizukuxp

Sure I had plenty of exhilirating moments as a not-so-typical 25-year old. I am well-educated, earning my 2nd Masters degree in Mathematics 6 months ago while pursuing a doctorate in a few days time. I am well-travelled; I've been to a lot of countries in Asia and a handful of states in the US of A, being a proud recipient of a 10-yr Multiple entry visa of that country. Once again, in a few days time I'll be conquering the whole new world of Europe. Back in my own country, I have my own car and invested my hard-earned cash in real estate. It may not amount to much but at least I have enough to tide me up during the rainy days.

But in spite of all of these self-pompous achievements, I would say that the thing I treasured the most is not my education nor my passport; the thing I have exceeds everything by light years. What I have is something way more special and makes me a lot happier, not because that's how people will perceieve me, but because deep within it truly gives a different sensation.

Perhaps anyone can guess what I'm talking about.

A couple of years ago I remember a senior colleague advising me about single-blessedness. She told me to treasure my youth and have a lot of fun being alone and be contented as such. I guess she has a point, afterall being a separated from a womanizer husband would eventually rub some phobia on commitments. So I listened to her stories intently and maybe I was a bit influenced that I found it almost impossible to be in any serious relationship. Deep inside I really wanted to be in one, but the lack of opportunities and my overall shyness always overcome my desires.

And so I just dated and .. dated .. and travelled around the world .. and dated even more..

How fruitless one life can be? "Like a train to nowhere." I always say!" I have had so much free time in my life that I have seen thousands of rants and ramblings on people's blogs to decipher the common of all such. Of course, it's human nature, and social culture as well, to establish some sort of personal pride and depict oneself as some sort of a 20-something-troubled-emo. How many times have I seen the phrases "Life sucks!" and "Life stinks!" like it's some sort of a vendetta against their existence.

"Been there, done that.." I have had my share of frustrations and my blogs has witness everything.

Which brings me to the main point of this entry: Why can't people simply admit that what is really missing in their life is LOVE! Sure there are plenty of important things one needs to accomplish or at least brainwash themselves to believing that "love" should not be a primary concern.

Like I have some studying to do, degrees to finish, promotions to get, family obligations to fulfill, church to serve, investments to make, people to meet, parties to attend, cigarettes to puff, blogs to write -- the list goes on infinitely, but your time doesn't. Something can really be of utmost importance or could just be trifling moments of comfort one wants to cling onto.

But for me, one thing is for sure. "I was born to love!" （恋してるのため、あたし生まれました！”

Maybe they are right and maybe I'm wrong. But one thing I'm sure of , compared to being single, being in a relationship rocks!!  

Currently listening to: Steve Jobs commencement speech
Currently reading: The Economist : The riddle of Iran
Currently feeling: satisfied

shizukuxp

Iba talaga kung paglaruan ka ng tadhana no? Biruin mong kahapon na dapat ay original flight schedule ko ay naunsiyame dahil nawala ang pitaka ko at nahuli sa pagche-checkin sa airport pagkatapos ngayon naman na nagparebook ako eh 3 hours delayed ang flight!!!  ayan ganyan po kapag napag-tripan ka ng mundo.

ok, ngayon narito na naman ako sa Fukuoka airport. medyo may kirot sa puso ko. masakit lalu pa't sa loob ng 2 linggo ay ang saya-saya namin ng mahal ko pagtapos ngayon magkakahiwalay na naman kame sa loob ng ilang buwan. hindi namin alam kailan ang susunod na pagkikita. kung saang airport na naman ang susunod na trauma. gusto kong umiyak, pero napapagod na ako. napagdesisyunan na naming matagal naming gagawin ang LONG Distance RELATIONSHIP o LDR kaya dapat ng masanay.  siguro sa loob ng dalawang taon ay ganito ang magiging buhay namin. kailangan kong maging matatag. hindi lang para saken kundi para na rin sa mahal ko.

naniniwala naman akong kaya namin ito. mahirap pero kakayanin. pipiliting kayanin. kahit ilang beses pa akong masaktan. dahil alam kong sa susunod na magkikita kame ay mas masaya sa nakaraan.  at kung ano man ang pagsasakripisyo namin sa kasalukuyan ay para rin naman sa aming kinabukasan. ganito talaga siguro ang umibig, kailangan mo talagang masaktan para maging matatag.

Currently listening to: Announcements in Fukuoka airport

shizukuxp

Five months ago, I got my acceptance letter as a CSI researcher in Ireland this fall. I forego a Network administrator offer in Korea as well as a sales position in Hawaii because I know that Ireland is the best possible option for me. Also I left all other possible opportunities in Japan in order to start preparing for my upcoming stint in Ireland.

CSI is the most enticing academic position I can ever dream of as an amateur mathematician specializing in cryptography. The allowance, priced around 20,000 euros annually plus other benefits like travel and conference money, insurance, etc. For someone who is just looking for temporary place to settle in, then it seems like a wonderful scenario.

I felt like my future is already secured and not only I can save some money, I would also be able to travel to different places in the world as part of the package deal. I thought that everything will proceed accordingly until I went back to my country and apply for my visa.

The signs were foreboding. Unaccommodating staff members in the Irish consulate, unhelpful to the point of rudeness, but at first I remained positive. Two months after my application and still no sign of an approved visa caused me to just panicked.

Why should this happen to me? I have a 10-yr Multiply entry visa to the US of A, and has entered the states four times, I have been staying in Japan for almost 3 years, I have Canadian visa, a long-term Korean visa, a Chinese visa, and I have travelled to Thailand, Vietnam, etc.

Now, I don't even have a job nor a prayer! I am running out of money and I have paid more than 500 euros in advance for my housing bill. And still, no one is considering my case!

I need that visa, and I need that NOW! I am supposed to fly tomorrow because I have to attend a tutorial in 5 days. Still NO VISA!!

Too much red taping! Too much!! I hate my country!

If nothing works out then I will be forced to just go back to Japan. look for a part-time job and prostitute myself until I can find a visa sponsor for me. I don't know what to do anymore.

Currently reading: Modern Japanese Readings for Foreign Students
Currently watching: OC Season 3 marathon
Currently feeling: distressed