I'm a filipino, by my birthplace and by bloodlines, since my mother did not opt to assume a chinese citizenship in the late 70's due to the taxes then imposed on foreign nationals.

Right now, I'm residing in tokyo as a graduate student and inspite of the homesickness, language barriers, and single(blessed)ness of living in a foreign land, I swear that I would want to do everything to stay here, or at least away from the philippines. actually, one of the main reasons why I applied for a scholarship abroad is to escape this seemingly inescapable and unfortunate fact of being a Filipino.

As an alumna of the university of the philippines (the counrty's most prestigious and progressive university), the chancellor would probably forfeit my academic degrees if my identity will be discovered. But nevertheless, I shall courageously stand to my beliefs even if they are directly opposed to the values and principles inculcated by my alma mater.

When i was still a student, I've written hundreds of blog entries testifying my purest intentions of serving my county. I dreamt of becoming a college instructor on my field of interest. I was an avid fan of many of my college professors who shun away from lucrative offers abroad and greener pastures in the industry.

I served several years as a college instructor, first in a famous private university which paved the way for me to fulfill my dream of teaching in UP. Those times have been fruitful and memorable for me and even if I earn significantly less than my batchmates, I didn't have any regrets, whatsoever. However, during those times I was seriously traumatized by a certain event, such proved to be the crux of my current life's conviction.

My experience is a concrete scenario which happens to most Filipinos using public transportation. I'm talking about being mugged, or more commonly referred to as 'holdap.' I bet that one in every four commuters in the metropolis have experienced the wrath of holdapers. Most of the times they just try to get your pricey stuffs like cellphones, cameras, or your wallet but sometimes the victim refuses give his/her stuffs and thus resulting in serious injuries or even fatality (cf the senior nursing student from UP Manila as well as the CHK major in UPD who jumped from the jeepney). I had three holdap incidents in total, but two of which just minorly traumatized me.

My third one however is one of the worst kinds. It was barely 8pm and i just came directly from my daily dose of praying in the UP chapel. I boarded the UP Pantranco jeep in SC and unaware of the next events, iIwaited for my stop--something which will never happen. as the jeepney egressed to the University Avenue, three filthy looking men declared the 'holdap.' One man took over the wheel and two others began sacking the passengers belongings. No, they didn't get the cellphone or wallet, they grabbed the whole package--backpacks, shoulder bags, etc. One guy was carrying a revolver, the other threatened to slash our throats with our non-compliance.

And then welcome to the joyride to hell!

The original jeepney driver desperately struggled to regain the wheel and that caused us to hit several other vehicles and inanimate walls. This lasted for an hour and after minor casual conversations with the most benovelent holdaper, I know that they are heavily drugged. They even tried to handpicked several good-looking women to come with them but thankfully forgotten the idea. They told everyone to get off the jeepney one by one as instructed. We are in the middle of nowhere, probably in the Scout Area where the streets are poorly lighted and no decent soul is venturing into.

Since i'm riding at the back of the driver i was the last to be allowed to go. However, when my turn came, my fingers were glued to book which i've been trying to hide from them, a book which i just borrowed from the library and cannot afford losing. I pushed my luck, and that mistake almost costed me my life. Mr. slasher charges straight to my face and surely I felt the tip of the blade touching my neck. I showed him the book and reasoned out that it doesn't cost a single cent. He agreed and finally let me go.

I've recounted that incident to my students and friends, to warn them of the impending danger of commuting in the philippines. Actually, not just in using public transpo, there are also quite a number of people whose cars are stolen or mugged while driving. Perhaps, there are not as many incident but we don't know what will happen if the poverty situation in our country continuous to plummet. It's quite obvious that the culprits behind  these types of crimes are those who are unemployed or underemployed and who lives below the poverty line. This is a given, but you know what makes the situation in our country really sickening? It's the fact there are way too much demonstrations and rallies in our contry!!

Pardon me if there seems to be a deviation from the topic. I just want to stressed out the connection which most of the time has been overlooked. I feel that the protests being launched against the government are simply more than what is necessary. The people forming the crowd lead by (UP) intellectuals are most of the times the holdapers/carnapers themselves. I'm not accusing that every poor person who attends mass demo is a holdaper, but at least one can successfully identify them on TV. All I'm saying is that why should the government ever listen or waste their time to the demands of these criminals who for one are just being used by elite people in disguised of their activist's views to advanced their own political agenda and secondly don't really know what the hell they're protesting against.

I read a rather comical view on the EDSA Tres rally saying that the participants must be heralded as heroes. My butt! The rowdy crowd  destroyed private properties to wild abandon and are yelling all kinds of crap on the TV. Yet the thing which is find to be the most disappointing is that this article is written by a UP intellectual, a former professor.

What i've experience is not something special, as I mentioned, a significant percentage of the population will testify  to the falliability of this story. Perhaps, not everyone will feel the same level of disgusts with the "crimes of the poor" but i'm sure that if they get to experience living in a safe country then they might rethink about it. Again, I'm not saying anything new and incredible here as migrants to other countries are on the rise.

I'm sorry because this article is quite useless as i didn't tackle any form of solution but just raged my complaints about the perils of living in the philippines. I'm just truly enraged as the situation in the Philippines seems so helpless and that no one has any idea for a viable solution. Anyway, my last word would be like this:

"As a Filipino, the greatest gift that one can give to his/her children is NOT education... but a foreign citizenship!"

 

-mG

 

P.S. and btw, wearing stupid white bands doesn't eradicate poverty in any concrete way! lol! now, that i'm pissed with Romeo, expect more of this bashings!

 

Currently listening to: Breaking the habit by Linkin Park

yesterday, my yahoo launchcast played a very striking insurgent folk song by PPM called "Have you ever been to jail for justice?" I googled for lyrics and thus learned of original artist-cum labor-activists Anne Feeney. Here is the link to her songs which you can listen freely btw. i hope u enjoy it as much as i do since this is basically the genre i feed on!

-mG

P.S. that song Hey Ronnie Reagan has very clever lines! 

Currently listening to: have u ever been to jail for justice

I had the same dream thrice, perhaps partly consciously done since the theme was really amazing and original. It would probably make a good plot for a film.

The first one began with a boy working for one of the powerful god's of the world. He seemed like an ordinary tenant: poor, messy, and quite unattractive. One hot day he was working in the king's garden when he saw the prince (the heir to the throne) come his way. The prince took notice of their worker and the filth got onto his nerves that he initiated an argument. Contrary to the "cardinal" rule, the boy fought back even if he will surely be beaten by the mighty prince. However, for some unknown reason, the boy overpowered the prince and unintentionally killed him. Suddenly, he found himself superior but since he hasn't realize that yet, he became a fugitive.

Everyone was searching for the boy and since he was up against the god of unlimited powers, he knows that he has to run far, far away. He hides on the forest and tried to camouflage himself only to be attack by wild animals controlled by god. And that's when he realize that he should try sailing away from that land hoping that god won't find him if he disappears completely from his domain. He came to a shore and when he dove to swim he realized that he was able to transform into a half-shark (cf Victor Krum in HP4). Morever, he also recognized that he can swim so faster than what is imaginable.

Probably, the story took place somewhere in the South America or South East Asia because the boy decided to himself that he will swim the Pacific all the way to the north pole. And there he would try to discover the truth regarding his identity.

While swimming on the vast ocean, he breezed past the oceanic creatures who were no match for his speed. For food, he catch fishes to his delight and feast on it on small uninhabited islands or at the back of floating whales. However, along the way, god has sent his troops to slaughter him and bring justice to his son. He was of course too quick for them but he gets tired running away and hiding behind corals or disguising himself in order to avoid detection.

God decided to build a gigantic net running all the way from the East Asian regions to the boundary of Westcoast North America just catch him. (It looks like a electrically charged barb wires bounding teritories with several  toll gates in between.) Good thing is that he manage to elude the net before the project was fully completed.

After a while he noticed the temperature decreasing which made him realize that he is nearing his destination. When he finally saw land, he was surprised that the north pole he was hoping for is not covered with snow but rather a mild temperate region with a modern community. He started searching for the ultimate device which would reveal his identity, although he really wasn't sure whether he's really searching for a real thing or just trying to run away from his former god.

Suddenly, there was a slight mood change a concrete human conversation took place. He met a female acquaintance who invited him for coffee in a very familiar place. Slowly, he remembers that it was a building from the school where he studied. He was once a normal person, a normal student, with normal friends.

God, being the god he is was aware that he reached this place and so he ordered his best troops to catch him. Since the boy was on land this time, he was no longer capable of outrunning everyone else. In fact, he realized that being on this land has limited his abilities. While he was with his acquianted on his school grounds, god's forces cornered him and almost caught him if not for the help of his friends.

His friend signalled him not to run and play along an act. When the gangly men asked for him, his friend told him that it's a case of a mistaken identity and that the boy is a permanent resident of this city. The disguise was played perfectly well and when the coast cleared, he sped off away from the school town. He didn't know where he was heading to but with his animalistic instinct he knew perfectly well that he is nearing his destination.

It took him days to reach the place. There lay a gigantic and mystical escalator in front of him and the only thing left to do is climb the elevator and see what lies beneath. Before he climbed, he noticed a normal newspaper stand and he inserted a coin to get one. He didn't know where the money came from because he has no memory of having to use one from the kingdom he came from. But there it magically appeared when he search his pockets. On the first page is a picture of his face as the most wanted criminal and on the next are pictures of his female acquaintance, an obese woman, a boy with the most striking face but he just cannot fathom who, and some other familiar faces. All of them were caught, tried, and killed for helping him escape. He was quite saddened with the news but now for the first time he can remember, he was feeling angry towards god. He climbed the escalator as fast as he could never looking back for the thousands of god's troops chasing him. Actually, the fat woman (ghost or whatever) suddenly pop up to block the way of these men.

When he reached the top, he saw a huge sign saying "To South Pole" and a cliff on the side. He was faced with more enemies waiting to shed his bones. He could've jumped on the cliff and outswam them but he just thought about all of those people who risked their lives for him to know his fulfill this thing. He saw a door behind the enemies line and he managed to elude them, enter the door, and close it from the inside.

In there, he was faced with the "guardian," god's final defence from intruders of the ultimate device. He was an unsightly piece of junk with mechanically-lighted eyes, stringy upper body, and long, sharp claws. The guardian was programmed to work well against your strengths, and since the boy has great speed, the guardian will also possess these powers. He tried to run in one direction only to find the guardian in front of him and receiving slashes. He sighted an entrance to the "sacred room" but he knows that there is no way to outrun the guardian.

The boy was left with no other choice but to fight the guardian on hand to hand combat. This marks the first time that he will make use of his fist after slaughtering the prince. The guardian continuously gash him with his claws until the boy found the perfect timing to grab the guardian and judo throw the massive body. When the guardian was at his back, the boy pulled on the claws so hard that it snapped, and then he used these to cut through the guardian's midsection.

He then raced to the room of the ultimate device. What he saw is the most fascinating object he's ever seen. There was a huge gap of clouds between the door and the device and falling onto the gap will zoom you into nothingness. The device was a towering, bronze-plated dial, which is obviously a time-and-space-warp but with a different twist. Using it will completely alter one's identity and give him a fictional world on a different time. The boy summoned his strength and jumped to the dial in front of him. He landed face-to-face with the buttons for him to go back to reality. He has no knowledge of the correct time-space data but his instincts told him all he needs to know. He thought about the boy from the picture and once again he remembered the feeling claled love.

There is no other choice, he said to himself, as this is the only way to save them--to go back to reality! No sooner than he pushed the buttons that I found myself waking up.

I found my body frigid and sweaty from such a fantastic dream. I used the toilet and then slept once again just to repeat the very same dream. Only this time, there was an emphasis that the main character was not a homosexual for loving the boy from the news clipping. But rather, the boy was originally a girl in real life (again, the device can alter sex of a person, and even the person itself--to an animal or for this case a half-animal). They were former lovers.

For my third dream, there was an immediate change as I assume the role of the boy and there was a repeat of the scenario of being chased out of the kingdom I was working in. However, this time only ended before I dove to the ocean to pursue my legend of knowing my identity. As I was trying to run away from god's troop, I noticed a restaurant ship floating on the docks. I entered the ship and tried to look calm and aloof from the soldiers who are searching me. The ship has a festive atmosphere (cf Odaiba or Hong Kong's floating ship).

And then from out of nowhere I saw the face of Sergey. He was the same boy from the newsclipping and he's my soulmate. I approached him and he started by telling me stories of a land mine that almost blew him up. There was a little girl waiting with him as well as some of our other friends. However, I immediately told him of what has happened and what shall I do to save all of us. We kissed for a long time, 5, 10, 15 minutes, I didn't keep tab of the time, but we had to end it when I heard the soldiers looking for me.

I said goodbye to my friends and I took Sergey's hand in mine because I cannot afford to lose him. I know that he will surely be killed because I already had that vision on my first dream but I just cannot let him go. We ran off to the connecting ship but we can't seem to shrug my chasers off. We kissed passionately once again fearing that it may be the last time ever. I saw the the deep end of the ocean and I know that once I jumped there I will transform into a shark and outswam everyone else. I looked for a passage where a trolley could speed him back to the other side and save him from our pursuers. I gave him one final peck on the lips before I said goodbye.

I jumped to the ocean but I looked back at Sergey for the last time. I hope that he will be able to board the trolley safely however to my dismay he decided to follow me and as he was about to dive, he was caught by my chasers. I shouted and began crying. I would want to blame myself but I know that there is still something to do to make things right. I cannot do anything about it at that time but if I repeat my first 2 dreams as is then I could go back to the way we were.

I woke up as soon as I dove my head to the water. I had tears on my eyes.

 

-mG

 

P.S. The dream somehow sounds like the personal legend theme of Paolo Coelho's "The Alchemist."  

For me, I interpret this as a way to let go of Sergey for the moment, in order to save him.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Currently listening to: When I fall in love by Westlife
Currently watching: Xmen 3: The final stand
Currently feeling: hopeful

lately it seemed like this thing with sergey is going to the pits. i know that i really like him and that he makes me happy but are those 2 things enough reasons to hold onto. the movie "serendipity" surely kept my spirits high but the longer time passed of not corresponding with each other, the less i would want to believe in it.

i was really changed when i met sergey. it's just like all of the years of searching and waiting has come to an end and finally i have found the one meant for me. suddenly, i regained my life's direction and most of all my faith in God, something which i've lost with being messed up by romeo and brian.

if only there is a way for me to meet sergey again, i would surely do whatever it takes and when that time comes, i swear that i will never let him go again. we make each other happy, that's one thing i can cling onto, and if that things is enough then God be my savior!

-mG 

Currently listening to: Tarzan and Barok
Currently reading: Reviewing for Nihonggo exam. 2 kyuu Kansen Masta!
Currently feeling: hopeful

Now that I'm single once again and quite busy with my newly found passion for my studies, I'm considering getting a FuBu instead of a real boyfriend. I've spent most of my time being alone and I'm kinda getting the hang of this singleblessedness and so maybe having a no-strings-attach FuBu is better than a real relationship.

Guys are so utterly despicable! But anyway, I need "it" sometimes and I cannot do the experiments alone. And so, if anyone here is interested, then apply now!

 -mG

Currently listening to: Where have all the flowers gone? by PPM
Currently reading: Kansen Master 2 Kyuu

got a little hooked with writing several pages of PYTHON codes that i've totally forgotten about my Japanese Language Exam in December... which is btw a real coo thing.

however, the stupid programming language is so damn slow that even the most optimized algorithms cannot factor even 30 digit integers of the form n=pq.

 

Currently watching: FRIENDS marathon
Currently feeling: thirsty

The program been's running for 28 consecutive hours, and still no factors of F(11)=2^2^11+1! Still waiting, still waiting...

chinami ni, doing math always makes me horny! even back then in my undregraduate years. that's why i missed sergey, no one to take care of this.

Currently listening to: Stigmatized by The Calling
Currently reading: Three new factors of Fermat Numbers
Currently feeling: horny

still have the "programmer's high!" while i'm waiting for the result of factoring Fermat's Numbers, i coded Shanks-Mestre's point counting technique for elliptic curves over Fp. (i'm not sure if it's gonna be important for my paper but it won't hurt to improve my programming skills!)

whoah! i got stumped by the automatic sorting function for lists. unfortunately, for this particular algo, the original indices are important! i tried everything to prevent this sorting from happening by immediately keeping tab of the index, but all efforts went for naught!

it just goes to show that computers are so dumb! so for people who still believed that the AI's and Gundam craps are gonna dominate the world one day, then they're dreaming. computers may have beaten humans in terms of sheer speed and power in computing, but without a real programmer to guide and command them, they're still like blind chicks. i'm not saying that there's no slight possibility of computers outconning humans, but based on their current performances; the future doesn't look bright for DAVID!

 

Currently listening to: You and I both by Jason Mraz
Currently reading: Prime Numbers by Crandall and Pomerance
Currently feeling: working

now, i'm single and not worrying about it too much and all of sudden the whole penis embargo is cool.

one downside about getting addicted into writing programs is that i'm beginning to smell like a hacker! my hair is a mess and i only shower once-a-day despite of the humidity in tokyo.

anyway, here's my update with my ECM reearch: implemented bernstein's curves as well as my own general parametrization. PYTHON is still unbelievably small that no amount of improvement of optimization can make it efficient. however, i'm still hoping that something good will come out of this!

-mG 

Currently listening to: If you are going to San Francisco by PPM
Currently watching: FRIENDS marathon
Currently feeling: nerdy

Being a part-time programmer and an amateur mathematician, I would say that PYTHON is definitely thebest tool I've encountered for my computational needs. Of course, it's hopeless to produce earth shaking results or even anything better than what has been discovered 10 years ago but still there are reasons why any person on the same situation as me should use PYTHON.

First of all, PYTHON is the easiest coding tool available in the world, at least among of all which I'm familiar with. I've experience with plenty of programming languages ranging from C, C++, JAVA, UBASIC (which is written in somehow a low-level Assembly language), and even the head turning OCCAM; but nothing beats the comfort which PYTHON offers. The learning time is so short that you can immediately jump to creating your very first  program even before someone masters the basics of Counter Strike.

Since my major is not computer science, I admit that I have mediocre programming skills. When I'm programming in all of those other languages, 99% of the time I get those errors on compiling, syntax usage, casting and declaration boo boos. And most of the time, I cannot proceed with the fun math part because I have to worry about all of these pedantic stuffs. For example, I forgot to declare that such a variable 'i' should be a long integer or that 'b' is a byte and or that function 'f' should be "public void". I mean, why should I care about that? I'm sure that a lot of people will symphatize with me.

Well, the good thing about PYTHON is that it is dynamic; meaning there is no need to declare variables. It's so flexible that you can assign anything to... anything. Moreover, say goodbye to those compiling errors since PYTHON doesn't require any separate compilation procedure. Once you get those pseudocodes in a format readable by the built-in PYTHON interpreter then those programs start running.

Another advantage of using PYTHON is that it comes with almost all LINUX and UNIX systems. I confessed that I'm still using WINDOWS but download is free from www.python.org and installation is also straightforward. So, no more problems where to get an installer of C++ or JAVA builder, right?

I can testify that PYTHON is definitely the programming language of the future. In fact, the most powerful search engine google relies on it's code manageability. NASA also chooses to use PYTHON because of its flexibility.

Meanwhile, for my own benefit, I have successfully written several libraries of useful math functions namely, a)Basic Number Theory functions, b)Elliptic Curve Arithmetic, including Montgomery's arithmetic, c)Elliptic Curve Method, (my proposed MS thesis for TMU d)Knapsack Cryptosystem (my MS thesis in UPD), e)Counting Points of an Elliptic Scheme. My future goal is to write an NTRU package, the one similar to Chad Hansen's program written in NTL (Chad and I are group mates in the summer school where we did that project). I'm aware that there are no new stuffs here (except maybe my own parametrization of elliptic curves for ECM) but thanks to PYTHON I got numerical results to make the hard abstract stuffs look more concrete. Anyway, I highly recommend PYTHON to anyone who needs to learn programming quickly.

 

 

 

Currently listening to: Coward of the County
Currently reading: Programming with PYTHON

Rustom ang beauty ko lately! For those who aren't familiar with "gay" lingo, it just means na CONFUSED ang lola nyo. Pasantabi lang kung uulitin ko na naman yung line na "Wake me up when September ends" pero kase this time may malaki talaga akong problema when September ends. Kailangan ko ng umalis ng dorm at maghanap ng bagong matitirhan.

Ang kaso eh medyo broke ako dahil alam nyo naman siguro yung laki ng ginastos ko ng mga nakaraang buwan (US Tour, Renewal of Japan Visa, at yung pagpunta ng Papa ko rito sa Tokyo). Hanggang ngayon hindi pa ako nakakarecover kahit pa sabihing dumating na yung 3 month allowance na na-hold. Dapat nga sana pupunta ako ng Korea kasama mga kouhai ko, you know, importante ang kouhai-bonding thing pero di talaga kaya ng budget.

Ang masakit kase sa Japanese housing system ay yung mga tinatawag na (Fuc)"KIN," pardon the pun! Kase imaginine nyo; halimbawa yung apartment ay may rentang ￥35,000. Pinakamura na yang ganyang klase sa Tokyo area. Ngayon kapag kinuha mo ang apartment na yun ay magbabayad ka ng 1 month ReiKIN, 1 month ShikiKIN, 1 month deposit, 1 month rent para sa agent's fee, at 2 year insurance worth 1/2 month of your rent! So, lumalabas, aabutin ka ng ￥150,000+!!

So ngayon punta tayo sa option 2: Guesthouse! Ang maganda rito sa guesthouse ay wala nang mga (Fuc)KIN payments, ￥20,000-￥30,000 deposit lang ay solve ka na. Tapos fully furnished na yung kwarto mo at kadalasan malapit ka pa sa train station. Ang downside nga lang ng guesthouse eh aabutin ka ng humigit-kumulang sa ￥60,000 kada buwan! Kapag binawas ko sa allowance ko yun ay tiyak na wala nang matitira sa akin. Kase kung ngayon nga na halos kalahati lang ang binabayaran ko ay tipid-na-tipid na ako para lang makaipon, paano pa kapag naka-guesthouse ako.

Pero anyway, eto ang aking dilemma. Kase kung aabutin pa ako ng higit sa 2 taon sa Japan ay parang mate-take ko na yung apartment option. Tutal kung malapitsa eskwelahan ako titira eh ibawas na natin ang pamasahe ko. Pero kung aalis na ako sa March 2007 ay mukhang mas favorable ang guesthouse option.

Ang tanong eh di ko na naman alam kung anong gusto ko. Parang gusto kong pumunta ng Hawaii o Canada. Sa October ay aattend ako ng conference sa Toronto pagkatapos ay magki-Christmas break naman ako sa Hawaii para bisitahin ang Tita ko. Para lang ma-feel ko kung gusto ko ba sa mga lugar na yun.

Actually after nung summer school sa Wyoming eh talaga namang bumalik yung interes ko sa Math. Lalu pa't nagkaboyfren ako ng isang "Number Theorist" rin (well, hindi ako sure kase parang wala sha masyadong alam"!) Pero the thing is nag-gagambatte talaga ako lately at medyo ayos na nga kame ni MC (hindi na ako galit sa kanya pero let's just stick to the codename!). Tapos since wala ring masyadong baito lately ay naka-focus talaga ako sa research ko. Tingin ko nga makakapagsulat ako ng matino-tinong papel, tapos may extra research pa ako na nakuha ke Silverman.

Anyway, yung punto ko lang eh parang ok na rin ako rito sa Tokyo. I mean kung tatanggapin niya pa ako para mag-PhD eh di na masama. Kase di ba, ang sarap kaya ng buhay ng mga PhD students rito, walang courses at puro free time. 

Gayunpaman, (naks ang bigat!) parang gusto ko rin ng bagong atmosphere. Napanood ko kase yung FRIENDS episode kung saan magli-livein si Phoebe at Mike, pero nagback-out si Phoebe kase wala namang balak si Mike na ikasal o magkaanak. Sabi ni Phoebe, "I never had a normal life growing up. Maybe it's time for me to have the usual stuffs!" basta parang ganun yung sinabi niya. Ako rin kase, parang iba yung buhay ko compared sa mga ordinaryong tao. Sa tanda kong ito, hindi pa ako nakakapag-try na magtrabaho. Hindi ko alam kung paano maging yuppy.

Bago ako pumunta ng Japan ay nagtuturo ako sa UPD at Ateneo, pero kase kapag nasa academe ka para ka lang naglalaro. Meron akong boss, yung dept chair, mga senior faculty or so, pero di naman ako nakikipagrelation sa kanila directly. Kumbaga kapag teacher ka, estudyante ang "kliyente" mo, at hindi sila. Pero shempre, huller, alangan ba namang magpaka-bossing sila eh ako ang teacher so ako ang "Diyosa ng kagandahan! DARNA!"

(Ano ba to, bat ako nababakla today? )

Alam ko na one day eh magtuturo ulit, katulad nang paniniwala ko na magkikita ulit kame ni Sergio, sa LA, Hawaii, Canada, Russia, Iraq, kahit saan pang lupalop ng mundo--pero sa ngayon parang wala pa ako sa mga bagay na iyon. Gusto ko lang i-try muna yung mga normal stuffs kahit pa alam ko namang hindi ko iyonmagugustuhan.

Siguro yung pinaka-praktikal na gawin ay yung maghanap ng trabaho dito sa Japan. Tutal gusto ko naman dito tapos narito na rin naman ako at shempre alam naman natin na maganda ang sweldo ng mga Pinoy rito. Pero ewan ko ba kung bakit walang appeal saken yung magtrabaho sa Japan. Siguro kase kahit sabihin pa nating gusto kong ma-try yung mga normal stuffs, eh parang hindi ko kaya yung mga ginagawa ng tao rito. Eh nung nagpunta ako sa America nakita ko na mas relaxed ang mga tao. Sa Japan kase parang robot na lang sila na gumigising sa umaga at makikipagsiksikan sa opisina at haharap sa computer at uuwi ng madaling araw... kahit pa bayaran nila ako ng 10,000,000 kada buwan ay di ko papatulan yung ganun. (promise! mala-Inday badiday sumalangit-nawa!)

Masyado nang mahaba eh wala pa rin akong resolution. Basta update ko na lang kayo. Pero for the meantime kailangan ko nang mag-decide regarding the apartment thing!

-mG

 

 

Currently listening to: Almost Here by Brian McFadden and Delta Gooden
Currently feeling: confused